We're back! {and an announcement!}

So vacation has come and gone, a whirlwind of beach sand, mini golf, forth of July fireworks and...morning sickness. Yep, you read that right: We're expecting our 4th child (due in February)! I just wanted to take the time to explain the reason for my prolonged absence from the blogosphere, which has a whole lot to do with exhaustion, queasiness...and did I mention exhaustion?! Indeed, first trimester has gotten the better of me, and I have had zero energy to do much of anything but, well, sleep. The chores have fallen behind, and I've been feeling a bit like a big old lump of...well, something icky that doesn't move much (see, I can't even think of a good analogy, here!). But alas, I'm happy to report that week by week I'm getting a wee bit of my energy back, as my first trimester draws to a close. I promise I'll soon return to my regularly scheduled ramblings, ponderings and other bloggy musings!

So in the meantime, check out our newest little bean! Isn't he/she just the cutest thing ever?! We think so, though I may be just a tad bit biased. :)

Vacation Bound!

out trip to the Outer Banks last year

Just a quick post to let you all know that things will be pretty quiet around here for the next couple of weeks while my family and I enjoy our annual trip to the Outer Banks! Looking forward to feeling the sand between my toes, the sound of ocean waves and eating plenty of my favorite: seafood! :)

Wishing you all lots of summer fun!

Four Thousand Suppers

Four Thousand Suppers

At the kitchen table
at six o'clock.
Dark winter evenings
with my father in his
winter underwear,
quilted like an astronaut.
Blue summer evenings
after my mother called my name
on the lilting breeze
which reached me
at far corners
of the neighborhood,
her voice known
among the others.


We ate
four thousand suppers
in that small room together.
What did we discuss?
Linoleum and carpet,
casement windows,
the wild McElroys,
the loud Mrs. Supportas,
scenes from the fifth grade,
my problems with bushels and pecks.
Four thousand suppers--
oceans of tea.
The man and woman
at the table
grow grey.
I grow up--
feet finally
reach the floor.

--Anne Higgins

I've heard it said that life is what happen when we're busy making other plans (John Lennon, I think?). And isn't it so true? For several years I used to be a liturgical musician, a time during which I played the organ and sang at literally hundreds of funerals. Over the years I've had the unique experience of hearing many a eulogy. And what always struck me about each one was how it was always the little "ordinary things" about people that resonated most in the hearts of loved ones. It wasn't the grandiose achievements, promotions, awards or special titles, but the little things. Things like, "she had a way of stroking my hair that made me feel so loved," or "Grandma's canned pickles tasted like none other." (one of the things I most cherish about my own grandma!). The things we treasure and hold dear in life are those everyday moments; the glorious smell of pasta sauce bubbling on the stove and sitting around the table laughing with family and friends.


We spend most of our time going about these everyday moments, though sometimes our minds might be too tied up in far-away dreams and goals to allow us to really take in the beauty of these ordinary moments. Take time to pause and consider the little things you hold dear, your four thousand suppers. What comes to mind? What are the sights, the smells, the sounds, the tender times that are uniquely precious to you?

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Thought-provoking Thursdays

Home...

Joining The Gypsy Mama again today for another "Five Minute Friday." Five Minute Friday is where we write for 5 minutes only on a given subject. It's so much fun--give it a try! The prompt for this week is "home." Here goes:



Start.

I step over the plastic shovel and cracked pail and pause to admire the front flower beds in full bloom. Little hands and big hands digging and planting together to create this beauty.

I climb the old crumbly cement porch steps littered with errant soda bottles that didn't quite make their way into the over-flowing recycling bin.

I turn the chipped gold knob of our old weathered kitchen door in desperate need of paint. Fifty-plus years of comings and goings evidenced by bits of turquoise peeking through bubbled and splintered layers of beige.

The door hinges squeak as I make my way through, greeted by a flurry of little hands and bodies dashing toward me, "Mommy's home!!"

Plaintive daughter cry of "mommy, mommy, mommy" both a request I pick her up and a scolding for leaving in the first place.

I scoop her up in my arms and feel the tension leave her little body as fragrant fruity breathe steadies, little chest rising and falling against mine.

Husband smiles a smile full of warmth and relief at my return:

I'm home.




Stop.

Happy Friday everyone!

Grace on a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

The other day I was having a truly awful day. This day could've made Alexander's "terrible horrible, no good, very bad day" look like a slice of heaven. It was your everyday run-of-the-mill bad day in the life of a frazzled stay-at-home mom...you know, one of those days where the kids wake up too early, bickering and just. stay. that. way. One of those days with seemingly endless sibling squabbles, a list full of too many to-dos and fantasies of a hot bubbling bath of Calgon coming to mind every few minutes.
Well, this particular terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day also happened to be a church day. And so, with frazzled mind and tired, sweaty cranky children, we piled into our van and shuttled off to Mass. I wish I could say that once we arrived at church things miraculously pulled a 180 and fell into place, but...alas, they didn't. The boys had ants in their pants , Megan fussed on my lap, Luke had to use the bathroom, Adam kept dropping things causing a loud reverberating thump and making my face grow redder and redder by the minute as my blood pressure shot through the roof.

At one point during the Mass I happened to glance behind me and caught the eye of an elderly woman. Her face was sternly set, and, I, in my frazzled state assumed she was gawking at our sad display of poorly behaved and out-of-control children. This only made me feel all the more stressed and I could not wait for evening of kids-in-bed peace.


We muddled through the rest of Mass and as we were about to leave, there was a tap on my shoulder. I turned to greet the face of the same elderly woman whose eye had caught mine earlier on. She greeted me with a warm gentle smile and said, "I just wanted to tell you what a lovely little family you have here. I see your family every week and I'm always struck by how nice and well behaved your children are. I know managing little ones isn't easy and you certainly have your hands full, but you are doing such a wonderful job here." I dang near burst into tears right there! I felt completely taken aback and immediately grateful for this sweet little old woman who took the time to tell me exactly what I needed to hear at the precise moment I needed to hear it. An earth angel with heaven-sent timing.


And immediately I realized in a classic lightbulb moment that I was (once again!) being way too hard on myself. I was making all of the wrong assumptions about my children's behavior. I was expecting the impossible from tired kids that were trying their best. But the truth is that God doesn't care how many times the hymnal is dropped or about the volume of toddler whimpers. He only cares that we show up, we try our best and we seek Him. Sometimes we Moms put a lot of pressure on ourselves, don't we? We expect the impossible from our children at times when they are just not able to be at their best. I'm often reminded that we, too, are like cranky toddlers in the eyes of God on the hard days, and it's at those times that He only asks that we turn to Him.


I'm so grateful for the lesson in grace, and for sweet little old ladies with kind assuring words.

"Come to me all who are weary and find life burdensome, and I will refresh you."

Weekend Reflection: I Thank You God

i thank You God for most this amazing
day:for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky; and for everything
which is natural which is infinite which is yes

(i who have died am alive again today,
and this is the sun's birthday; this is the birth
day of life and of love and wings: and of the gay
great happening illimitably earth)

how should tasting touching hearing seeing
breathing any--lifted from the no
of all nothing--human merely being
doubt unimaginable You?

(now the ears of my ears awake and
now the eyes of my eyes are opened)

-e.e. cummings


This is one of my absolute favorite poems of all time (and, incidentally one of my favorite poets as well!). In all we do over the weekend, take a moment to give thanks to God for this most amazing day. Take time to really notice the "leaping greenly spirits of trees and a true blue dream of sky". There is a feast for our senses all around us if only we are willing to walk with the "ears of {our} ears awake and the eyes of {our} eyes opened."


I want to share with you a gorgeous musical setting of this poem, by a very talented composer Gwyneth Walker. (It makes me cry every time I listen to it!) Music just has a way of stirring my soul and making words come alive to me. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

Backwards...

I'm participating in another Five Minute Friday this week with The Gypsy Mama! Five Minute Friday is where we write for 5 minutes flat on a given subject, no editing no fretting. Just enjoying the process. It's so much fun-give it a try! This week the prompt is: backwards.

Start:

When I was a little girl, my absolute favorite ride at the local amusement park was a wooden roller coaster called the Thunderbird. And the best part of this little old coaster: it went backwards. There was just something so incredibly thrilling about not being able to see what lie ahead--not seeing the big drops as they approached, the twists, the turns and bumps in the road that jostle, catch you off guard and leave you feeling off-kilter. But to just enjoy the drops as as they came was so freeing, so...fun!

Oh, as an adult to be able to enjoy riding backwards! To delight in the unknown path ahead, trusting it'll be a fun ride, a thrill, nothing to fear. There's something beneficial to being able to ride backwards, to not look ahead but instead just enjoy the moments as they come. To not get bogged down by planning and fear and mistrust. But just riding, whizzing through life with your eyes closed tightly in joy and hands waving carefree in the air.

Stop.

image source

Happy Friday everyone!